TAMAJI: Beloved Guruji. Would you talk about your mission on this earth planet? My second question is, my mother passed away recently. We lived ten thousand miles apart for the last thirty years, so I could not be with her when she died. But when I saw her face in the casket at the funeral, I had an experience that seems contradictory. On one hand, I experienced a continuum from life into death. Another part of me experienced a very thin but deep gap between life and death. Would you talk about what my experience was? Thank you.
GURURAJ: The experience in knowing the life and death and experiencing the gap defies itself, for there is never any gap between life and death. The gap people would experience is the gap created within one’s own mind. For where could [be] the gap, like our professor will tell us. Where is the gap between life and death? For life is nothing else but a continuation of life itself, so death becomes no gap. But because, mother dear, of your attachment, that you start feeling the gap. And let me tell you the reason why, mother dear, why you feel the gap. You feel it because something is wrenched away from you, and therefore you feel the gap.
Now for certain people I have given the techniques of the gap. And that gap really means that within your breathing in and out there is a central point that makes you feel that gap. So between the in and the out there comes that gap which is eternity itself. The gap created because of the loss of a loved one is no gap at all. Let the loved one go. Let him go, or he or her, whoever, because–the answer is so logical–that you too will be going in the same way.
So what causes the gap? Is the gap caused by life, or living, or by death, or dying? Answer that question to yourself. But the real gap that has to be found is one. And that question is this, that within the very breath that I live in, let me find the difference of the inward and the outward that forms that gap to make me know, to make me realize, that life and living is also composed by that momentary gap.
How do you breathe? Do you know how you breathe? That in that very breath of yours (where’s my cane, darling, I’m feeling very lame today) that in that very breath of yours, of the inwardness of yourself and the outwardness that goes through, there is that momentary gap which is the center of you. Find that gap and you will know how to find the center within yourself.
So, beloved ones, stop being a sap; become the gap. This is English humor which you people might not understand. I don’t know. Who am I to know? I’m feeling a bit weak physically. I think the doctor gave me a very high shot of insulin or whatever, I don’t know. The body is very very weak, but the mind is alive and forever there, to answer any question that you might have, and giving it its truest answer, which you will never find in any book, and you can look in front of yourself, or even in your behind.
So the basis of the question that I’ve lost a beloved one of mine, my mother, and I feel that gap. The reason why you feel the gap is your own personal inadequacy. For if you were adequate within yourself you would say, father, mother, son, or child, if you have to go, then go away. I will not feel the gap. But I’ll always feel the love and the loving that was provided to me through all these years while you were bringing me into this world, with your loving care, and that is what I want to remember, and that in my heart’s delight. That is all I can share. And I cannot share it with a dead one. How can I? But I can share it with the loved ones that are alive, and share it at the same time for that greater power that exists beyond me that is giving and loving and sharing and caring and whatever else that goes with it.
Please understand one greater truth. Do not mourn for those passed beyond. Because that serves no purpose at all. But mourn in your heart’s yearning for those that live around you. What is of greater importance? Tell me. The one that is dead? Or those beloveds that are alive? Do you see the difference? The dead are dead. Forget it, for you, too, yourself one day will be dead. But while you are alive, remember those that are alive and sharing and caring of the love that you could find within your hearts, in that beauteous giving. Never talk to me about death. It is non-existent. But true existence is to be found within life itself. And life itself is true existence because you are living life in the truth of its own existence. What more do you want?
I can’t see. What time is it? Forty-five minutes. We can still go on.
